Baylor Hires Space Cowboy, Hawk Hawkings

Since the Meaty Bears have gone silent and Osler has a thing for pandas, I went on the hunt for a picture of Baylor's newest hire. Below are the fruits of my labor.

Art Briles does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Art Briles.

We can only hope Red Andrews retirement is simply a temporary sojourn in search of Tommy Lee Jones jokes. We have a seven year contract ahead of us.

B-School Takes Time off Facebook

With the end of the semester quickly approaching, the b-school has transformed into a different place. Between the three presentations and two projects completed Monday, the two papers due tomorrow and the two finals on Thursday, I've managed to stay busy with things outside the confines of my pants. It's multi-tasking at its finest.

Summer Starter's Do Things

I'm currently in Vail spending Thanksgiving with my girlfriend's family. Thanks in large part to global warming and small part to my lack of creativity, it should be a vacation spent eating, drinking and getting touched by strangers.

And though I lament the lack of snow, things could be worse. I could be one of the two summer starters who used the previous weekend to get engaged or a third whose wife gave birth to their first child.

I'd offer my congratulations but it seems kind of counterintuitive. After all, they aren't going to be touched by strangers for a very, very long time.

Soccer and Segregation

This weekend's GBA soccer tournament was titled, "USA v. the World." As you can imagine from the previous sentence, one team had Americans while the other team had non-Americans.

I'd describe the event further but I think everyone already knows how it went. The foreigners were good, they let the American's score a few goals and everyone wore clothes. No surprises.

The B-School Busy Season

Right now, in the week before Thanksgiving, MBA groups are scrambling as seemingly every class has a combination of papers, projects and presentations coming due within the next several days.

The hours are rather long, the group work can be hard if not impossible to organize efficiently and people in general can't seem to help but brag about how busy their lives are.

Fortunately for most students, Thanksgiving break will be a relaxing experience. The groups will have dispersed, reappearing on Friday - Sunday to put the finishing touches on work due Monday and the remaining two weeks will have the occasional presentation or test scattered carelessly about until December 6th.

After that date, MBA students will disband until January 14th*, recouping with a well deserved one month and eight days of break.


*I will be here in Waco, mentally preparing for December 14th's Law Prom.

DVD Plans on Featuring Wacoan Areolas

As a future Juris Doctor, it's my legal duty to report that Wild West - Waco's home of "2-stepping and long necking" - will be playing host to an official Girls Gone Wild party this coming Wednesday, November 14th.

In case you were unaware, girls of all shapes and sizes use these events to compare uninhibited-lesbian impressions while guys judge the performances based on a number of factors, not the least of which are their penises. Though no money is awarded, the winning females get the cathartic pleasures associated with showing the world their fathers' didn't care. The whole process is scientific, really.

"Raise your hand if you seek attention."

And in case you're the kind of person that is concerned about what Baylor thinks or you're simply a gloomy Gus when it comes to stuff like getting suspended, here is the link to Baylor's official stance regarding sexy misconduct or, as they like to call it, "acting inconsistent with the Christian principles to which Baylor seeks to adhere."

In the off chance you didn't click the above link, I'll sum it up by recommending you never get filmed performing the sic' em bear claw while appealing to, or contemplating prurient interests.

MBA Progressive Dinner

Tonight at 5:51 PM - that isn't a typo - students and faculty will be meeting at the business school to carpool/caravan over to the home of our beloved Career Development Advisor, Ken Buckley. Once appetizers are eaten, the caravan will continue on to two other homes of two other professors, for two other meals.

While I'd love to see it, I don't know how well the concept would work at the law school. Something tells me most of the professors don't want me to know where they live.

Timeliness Is No Longer My Thing

First, congrats to the good people at the Law School for again having the highest bar passage rate in Texas; second, congrats to several current PC students for patronizing Scruff's on Halloween. For those that missed it, the night was an enchanting array of merriment and tomfoolery.

If you're looking for signs of changing times, Coach Schnupp was not in attendance and I wore a costume featuring pants.

In more recent news, I've been shirking my duties here at FromMalibuToWaco in favor of Madden '08 on the Wii and a blog devoted to Texas energy, deregulation, economics, and oil prices. As thrilling as that sounds, and as eager as I know you are to read it, its all part of an as-of-yet-unpublished corporate website for an upstart energy brokerage / aggregation company that is presently coming to Waco. Meaning, my words are sort of on the internet but not really.

In the mean time, good luck on finals. I hear law students need that sort of thing.