The Terrorists Have Already Won

My 4th of July was spent in the library, contemplating my imaginary friends from Memoland: Vance Vanderhoff and Chase Carter. Vance OD’d on heroin and I’m supposed to figure out if it’s Chase’s fault for not taking him to the hospital.

Fuck that I say.

If SoTheBearSays can argue that North Atlantic pirates sank the Titanic, I’m arguing Vance’s death was the result of a covert government operation to kill suspected spies and powerful black advocates. Thirty or so pages later I realized I wasn’t supposed to be arguing anything . . . or going over 6 pages . . . or being creative . . . but I used a double spaced, fully justified, size 12, Times New Roman, with 1” margins so I doubt Prof. LARC will mind.

I started with Vance’s death and worked my way backwards in time. I was just getting to the part where the Community Revolutionary Inner-Party Service (later known as the CRIPS) began being infiltrated by the CIA, when fireworks started exploding over the Brazos.

I tried to put aside my cynical views for a moment and appreciate everything this great nation has given me. I thought long and I thought hard but all I could think about were the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure, Article III Section 2 of the Constitution, Title 28 Judiciary and Judicial Procedure, and the 5th and 14th Amendments.

It was then I realized it’s not just Vance my government hates.