My First Mock Trial

You may be asking how I already have a mock trial. I’m only a little over 7 weeks into law school but I’m defending Mean Joe Greene. Tomorrow is the culmination of two weeks of preparation. 12 teams were assigned one of four roles and we are having 3 separate trials. I’m still not totally sure how it’s going to work but Prof. Torts is the boss and she says it will work. I’m obligated to believe her.

My role is a 4 minute closing statement in which I will say:
“Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the evidence proves Mr. Greene reflexively bitch slapped one Mark Cockreil who is poorly feigning injury akin to a Portuguese soccer player. Please don’t let him collect Mr. Greene’s bling-bling; he don’t deserve it.”

Two weeks of effort, and I can’t say I’ve learned a damn thing. An anonymous professor said that this escapade will come back to haunt us. I hope anonymous professor was kidding.