Keeping it Gangster

Picture a late night rap video from B.E.T. “Uncut” minus the nude promiscuous females. Basically I’m talking about a bunch of hoodlums standing around a car, drinking beer and malt liquor, listening intently as a car’s system fills the air with bass filled insights into keeping it real.

Now replace hoodlums with law students, and that’s how it went down.

Because Crickets couldn’t quench the masses’ need for ‘crunk’ I invited a motley group of people back to my place. Basically, the upper quarters decided that they preferred the parking lot to my apartment and consequently went wilding out from the hours of 2:30 – 5.

Surprisingly, the cops never came; they should have but they didn’t.

Imagine the conversation:

Officer: What are you kids doing?
Me: Umm. . .we range in age from 21 – 30 so I’d hardly describe us as kids.
Officer: You are how old? What the hell are all of you still doing at Baylor?
Me: We go to law school?
Officer: You must be shitting me?
Me: I shit you not sir.
Officer: I’m sure one of you has an apartment, why are you out here?
Me: Just getting crunked sir . . . just getting crunked.
Officer: You’re going to jail Mr. Swanburg.

Only one person came outside to complain and it turned out to be a fellow law student. His requests for quiet went unfurnished by the merrymakers and he begrudgingly returned to his apartment.

I’ve transitioned from bottle service in L.A. to parking lot pimping in Waco. The latter is seemingly more entertaining.