GBA Golf Tournament

Last Friday -with no birdie girls on hand to smile and serve in all their pink glory- Battle Lake Resort and Country Club played host to the Graduate Business Association (GBA) golf tournament. Though my two person team didn't win the scramble event, both my heart and immune system remained pure . . . because birdie girls can change all that.

To quote the official website:

The Birdie Girls, dressed in eye catching outfits and loaded with "talent," meet golfers at their cars with golf carts . . . . They also provide friendly welcomes to golfers at tournaments and outings.

If putting the word talent in quotes and the phrase friendly welcomes in bold wasn't enough to ruin the subtlety of the above journo-porn, here is the golf course slogan:

"The hardest golf course in Texas . . . to keep your eye on the ball!"

Literary genius. The exclamation point lets you know the experience will be both hot and classy.

Anyway, the birdie girls didn't happen, the business school had a golf tournament, students paid $25, professors paid $55, the money went to a good cause and nobody had outdoor relations. Things might have gone differently at the law school.