Sunday, February 11, 2007

I Got a Summer Job


We haven’t ironed out the details but from what I gather, I’ll have an expense account that covers alcohol, gas, steel toed boots, and a hard hat; my office will be a pick up truck with XM, Sirius, and GPS; I will need a couple business suits, some pearl snaps and a few pairs of wranglers; it’s important I know how to do title searches.

When asked why the truck had both Sirius and XM, my new boss replied, “Just because.”

In case you’re wondering, I’ll be a landman. Since the title itself may or may not help, I’ve taken the liberty of stealing the job description from salary.com:

“[A landman] confirms land ownership and availability for lease/purchase. Negotiates agreements with land owners for drilling or production rights. Drafts and administers contracts; ensures compliance with government regulations.”

I was offered the job at a cocktail party in San Antonio and my God I’m excited. Since I’m now an expert on landing jobs, I’ll impart my technique to others:

Guy: So you’re in law school?
Me: Yea, so far so good. I just finished up my first year at Baylor.
Guy: Oh yea, what kind of law are you interested in?
Me: So far I’m leaning towards Real Estate Finance, Oil and Gas, or something along those lines.
Guy: I deal with a lot of oil and gas lawyers and they are all idiots. They don’t understand my time limits, they don’t understand the business. They only thing they understand is the paperwork and billing hours. Do you want another drink?
Me: You read my mind.
Guy: Well if you want a job, you can work with me this summer. One day you’ll be in the boardroom talking to execs, the next you’ll be driving out to the shittiest parts of Texas, ass deep in mud.
Me: What exactly would I be doing?
Guy: You can come with me, check out land; figure out who owns it and what’s there. Once that’s done, you work a deal with whoever owns the land and buy them drinks until the deal is closed. Can you do a title search?
Me: Absolutely
Guy: Good I hate that shit. Make sure I get your information by the end of the night and we’ll figure out the rest of the details.
Me: So I get to buy a pair of Wranglers?
Guy: That will be covered but you better buy more than one. We’re talking about ass deep mud.

So that was that. My first job in law school involves ass deep mud, a pick-up truck, and Wranglers. I’ve come a long way and couldn’t be happier.

9 Comments:

At 9:41 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am overcome with joy. A guy I typically point at as "wanting to be a Texan" now thinks he has the cred. What a beautiful day.

 
At 10:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Congrats! You're perfect for the job. A landman is 95% BS, with the remaining 5% requiring absolute perfectionism in title searches. You can get anyone to sign your lease on your terms and have him thanking you as you leave. You "scout" rather than "trespass" or "infringe" and you spend 99% of your expense account on booze rather than food. Being a landman is great; I was one for Conoco years ago and loved every minute of it.

 
At 10:47 PM, Blogger Mark Osler said...

I'm drivin' down to Del Rio tomorrow. Can I borrow your truck?

 
At 12:30 AM, Blogger Alan said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 12:32 AM, Blogger Alan said...

Make sure they give you a real truck, not some dinky Ford Ranger or Chevy S-10. Diesel engines and large pipes are a plus.

-Says he who drives a Ford Focus.

P.S. I'll let you have my neighbor's 1978 GMC pickup. It's school bus yellow, and all you'd have to do is be over here at 6:30 one morning when he can't seem to get it cranked. It should, however, be perfect for a SUMMER job, b/c it only fails to crank in cold weather.

 
At 10:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Pick up truck? Wranglers? Naturalized fo sho.

 
At 1:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You should thank Prof. Property

 
At 3:06 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahahaha grats swanny!

-thomas

 
At 4:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Awesome! That sounds like a sweet summer job! I think it would be cool to drive out to the "shitiest" parts of Texas to look at land.

 

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