Re-Writing the Rules
The current house Beer Pong Rules need some work. It’s come to my attention that every Friday evening, someone starts a fight over the enumerated rules so ineffectively laid out by one of our fellow classmates.
The driving forces behind this reform are the overachieving law students who keep screaming about “the drafters’ intent.” Allow me to let you in on a little secret my friends. The drafter was an intoxicated, belligerent, female who had no right to wield a Sharpee, nevertheless draft a set of binding rules. Therefore we shall start anew. The board shall be flipped over, and a new set of rules transcribed. They shall be coherent, logical, and effective.
Here is the newest version, feel free to make changes.
Here is the newest version, feel free to make changes.
And if that doesn’t do it for you, tonight from 9 – 11 the Liquidated Damage Tour will be making its second stop at Tom’s Tavern. Be there or be square.
posted by Jon Swanburg @ 5:14 PM
11 comments
11 Comments:
Just looking at the rules makes me want to drink.
No change is necessary. The Beer Pong Motha-Fuckin' North Star should be just that -- a north star or guiding light. Like the constitution, it should set up values and structure -- not legislate. Individual disputes should be settled on a case-by-case basis. Let the beer common law fill in the gaps! Otherwise, we'll be no better than Louisiana -- and, do we really wanna go there?
TJ: the only reason that doesn't work is because. . . well . . . it's a drinking game. The law must have some level of consistancy and predictability if its to have value.
The learned Judges decisions get more convaluted as the night goes on and then next day they usually don't remember what was said.
Come to think of it, that's probably why Louisiana law is the way it is.
i have a comment/suggestion/bitch concerning article IV section 28 of your revised rules. that section defines legal and illegal acts to distract the opposing team. i feel it should be expressly prohibited (as intentional misconduct) for a defending player to block the shooting team's view of their cups, using hands, feet, clothing or any other means. for instance, if the opposing team is shooting, a definding player cannot place their hands in the shooters line of sight as to impair his/her view of his/her target cups. unscrupulous players have been known to obstruct the shooting player's view of his/her target cups while that player is shooting by waving their hands in front of the cups.
please consider banning such tactics.
Anonymous: Are you kidding me? The hand-wave is the corner stone of beer pong defense. You can't write such "obstruction" out of the rules... it would be un-American. Besides, if the defensive player leaves their hands there too long and the ball touches them, they automatically lose a drink. Quit your crying and get me another beer.
I have something to say...SWANBURG YOU UNGRATEFUL BASTARD.
First of all, I was NOT intoxicated when those rules were written, and I think they are actually quite beautifully simple. People will argue over the rules no matter how detailed they are, you know that. And if no one respects the law and you change it without consulting anyone...then you suck.
And another thing, remember how I always bring the music to the party? And the trashbags? And help clean up? Your apprecition and gratitude is lacking, and if I had feelings I would be offended.
Eighth of all, I hate you.
First, I'm with Carver, the hand wave should stay.
Second, Haley, I love you. I do . . . its so plainly true. Since such is the case, I'll take your concerns in order.
I sort of just assumed the intoxication. I still believe it was a fair assumption.
The rules were beautifully simple but they gave you too much power. I didn't like that.
I haven't officially changed the rules. I've proposed rules and have asked for changes and suggestions. I would never just change rules without others input. That would be irresponsible and counter-productive.
You do bring the trashbags, you do bring the music, and I'm sure if you woke up next to me, you'd be sure to rub my back and make me breakfast. You are a much appreciated person and my life wouldn't be the same without you.
Yeah, I think that some words just need to be defined, a full on change seems off, and we don't want people banning defense and shit talk, the highlight of the game. Beer pong is a game about defense, and the ability to defend the cups (without hitting the ball before it hits something) should remain paramount.
I just realized I left out all rules related to or regarding blowing. This may be a problem.
only impotent tools who cant win a game w/o resorting to cheap tactics wave their hands in front of cups
Beer pong has rules? I thought the only rule was "no rules." Rinsing the ball off between turns was always nice, but after several "rounds" winning and losing was always a matter of perception. Has anyone every played with a live kitten?
Post a Comment
<< Home