The Clean Version

Girl: Hey, my friends and I are leaving; by any chance do you want to come?
Me: Where you going?
Girl: Collins.
Me: Collins as in the place I’ve dreamed of sleeping since I discovered its existence?
Girl: Um. . . .
Me: Collins as in Baylor’s most coveted freshman female dorm?
Girl: Yea.
Me: Isn’t that against the rules?
Girl: Only if you get caught.

(long thoughtful pause)

Me: I can’t. I’d love to but I can’t.
Girl: Why? Do you have a girlfriend?
Me: No, but I live here and I can’t just leave.
Girl: You live here? I thought some law student lived here.
Me: Um. . .
Girl: I thought you said you were a freshman?
Me: No. I said I was a first year double majoring in the Dark Arts and Latin.
Girl: Oh
Me: Yea.
Girl: This place is really nice, thanks for inviting us.
Me: Inviting is a strong word but I’m glad you came.

I’m forced to omit tons of great details but it was an interesting night.

Unfortunately, intermingling law students and undergrads rarely goes well; especially when people start using law jokes. i.e. “This is like a huge 12(b)(7) violation for inappropriate joinder of parties.”

And when the undergrads would start acting like undergrads I’d hear,

“Is Haley T. going to have to choke a bitch?”**

And that’s that. No more Friday night parties until after finals. But seriously, it’s not everyday that your neighbors and 100 of their closest friends decide to drop by.


**Fortunately, Haley never acually choked anyone.